After some heavy topics, I thought today I would add a dash of humour to my blog post!
Do you know which poem first got me interested in writing poetry as a child? One of my school textbooks had a poem called "Macavity: The Mystery Cat" by T.S.Eliot which I completely adored. It is a portrait of a feline felon, albeit written in a humuorous way. Every line of this poem is a wonder - the poet gives the cat all the traits of a criminal mastermind, yet manages to retain Macavity's cat-like characteristics - his unbelievable powers of levitation, his enigmatic attitude, and his ability to mysteriously disappear from the scene of crime (which is what all cats do!). You do not have to be an animal lover to appreciate this poem, though it helps if you are :)
Macavity: The Mystery Cat
Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw—
For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
For when they reach the scene of crime—Macavity's not there!
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime—Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air—
But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there!
Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake;
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake.
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square—
But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there!
He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair
Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!
And when the Foreign Office find a Treaty's gone astray,
Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,
There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair—
But it's useless to investigate—Macavity's not there!
And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:
It must have been Macavity!'—but he's a mile away.
You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumb;
Or engaged in doing complicated long division sums.
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare:
At whatever time the deed took place—MACAVITY WASN'T THERE !
And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known
(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time
Just controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!
The world is full of many a singer
Some are old and some are new,
But wherever you go, you're sure to hear
Merrybingo's renowned mew!
Merrybingo's the most revered of them all,
His voice has a fame so much
That even kittens who can't crawl
Will lick the ground his paws touch!
His purrs are the generation's craze,
(They say even Michael Jackson imitates a few!)
And when he gracefully bows on the stage,
His feline looks make females swoon!
Merrybingo's a unique Siamese,
His albums are all super-hits,
And everybody dances to the tune of his
"I saw you over a bowl of fish!"
His voice causes waves of cat hysteria,
His songs can even cure diphtheria,
For never before did the world know
A singer as great as Merrybingo!
For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
For when they reach the scene of crime—Macavity's not there!
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime—Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air—
But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there!
Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake;
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake.
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square—
But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there!
He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair
Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!
And when the Foreign Office find a Treaty's gone astray,
Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,
There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair—
But it's useless to investigate—Macavity's not there!
And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:
It must have been Macavity!'—but he's a mile away.
You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumb;
Or engaged in doing complicated long division sums.
Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare:
At whatever time the deed took place—MACAVITY WASN'T THERE !
And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known
(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time
Just controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!
I was so influenced by this poem that I wrote my own version of a cat poem. I had, at that time, watched Michael Jackson dancing in one of the Grammy Award ceremonies and my fertile imagination conjured up the poem reproduced below :)
Merrybingo!
The world is full of many a singer
Some are old and some are new,
But wherever you go, you're sure to hear
Merrybingo's renowned mew!
Merrybingo's the most revered of them all,
His voice has a fame so much
That even kittens who can't crawl
Will lick the ground his paws touch!
His purrs are the generation's craze,
(They say even Michael Jackson imitates a few!)
And when he gracefully bows on the stage,
His feline looks make females swoon!
Merrybingo's a unique Siamese,
His albums are all super-hits,
And everybody dances to the tune of his
"I saw you over a bowl of fish!"
His voice causes waves of cat hysteria,
His songs can even cure diphtheria,
For never before did the world know
A singer as great as Merrybingo!
I wrote this when I was 15 years old and it was my second published work. It was published in the Children's section of The Statesman, Kolkata edition. Granted, it can't be compared to the maturity of my later poems but it will always hold a special, warm place in my heart :)
If there was ever a happy poem, effervescent with joy and lightness of being, this is it! I am totally enthralled by Merrybingo's renowned mew and his purrs which MJ had the audacity to copy:) Loved this cos it takes me to a stress-less place. And,once again am SO impressed by your poetry, and how u flit between sombre and funny with so much ease.
ReplyDeleteThank you! Your words encourage me to write more :)
ReplyDelete